Like I've mentioned in previous posts, there was one time in my life that I’ve been slightly overweight. During those times, I’ve faced loads of negative comments about my shape and what I ate. Painfully , I got over that.
But now that I’ve lost all that weight and then some, I’m getting another round of bad talk in another different way altogether.
“ You ni dah kurus sangat la”
“ Ada orang kata kurus sangat cam ni dah tak lawa dah”
“ Aiyahhh, why so skinny one? Depressed ah?”
First of all, I’m not skinny. My BMI shows that I’m normal. I know I’m strong and not lethargic like some skinny people and should I emphasize that I’m eating normally and healthily and not cutting back to stay this way. I’d like to think that I’m lean. But definitely not toned, as much as I want it to be yet.
Why the naughty comments, people ? Last time gemuk pun bising, la ni dah kecik pun bising lagi. And the thing is with our society, they like to link weight loss to personal tragedies. Are you having problems? Is your partner treating you well? Are things going well at the workplace?
The worse I came upon is “ Why are you losing all this weight? Are you afraid that if you get fat your husband will go astray?” That’s so insulting, I had to laugh.
Sorry to rain on your parade, Gossip gurus but I’m not that insecure. I’m doing this for me. I want to be a healthy person. I want to be an energetic parent. I don’t want to be out of breath while taking care of the kids and doing household chores. I don’t want to get older and at the same time grow sideways. I want to show that it’s a misconception: you get married, have kids and get fatter –it’s the norm.
When I tell people that, they tend to look at me and smirk. Then they’ll say something unintelligent like , “ Macam perli aku je” . Argh. You brought this up upon me and then suddenly it turns to be about you. Apakah?
So to avoid all that drama, I’ll just smile and shut up. I’ve given up explaining my goals. I’ve given up telling them why I run and exercise and tackle the stairs even though the elevator door is conveniently open. I’ll only tell my story to those who are interested to hear. And I’m not saying I’m all high and mighty and better than them for opting to be this way. They can be what shape they want and be happy about it. I say ;That’s you. That’s your choice. But don’t go around and say hurtful things even if ‘stick and stones can break my bones but words can never harm me’. They don’t harm, but they sure do hurt.
I guess I should focus on what’s important; I’m able to carry my 3 year old heck, even 6 year old, up the stairs without wheezing. I can wear what I want without worrying about any body parts bulging over, I have my husband by my side with mutual goals. I'm happy with me.
Funny thing is, I thought it was a woman thing but hub who lost 10kgs due to running, got this not so long ago,
“ Hei, apsal dah kurus. Bini ko tak bagi makan ek?”