Thursday, June 10, 2010

Weighty Issues.

Like I've mentioned in previous posts, there was one time in my life that I’ve been slightly overweight. During those times, I’ve faced loads of negative comments about my shape and what I ate. Painfully , I got over that.

But now that I’ve lost all that weight and then some, I’m getting another round of bad talk in another different way altogether.

You ni dah kurus sangat la”

“ Ada orang kata kurus sangat cam ni dah tak lawa dah”

“ Aiyahhh, why so skinny one? Depressed ah?”

First of all, I’m not skinny. My BMI shows that I’m normal. I know I’m strong and not lethargic like some skinny people and should I emphasize that I’m eating normally and healthily and not cutting back to stay this way. I’d like to think that I’m lean. But definitely not toned, as much as I want it to be yet.

Why the naughty comments, people ? Last time gemuk pun bising, la ni dah kecik pun bising lagi. And the thing is with our society, they like to link weight loss to personal tragedies. Are you having problems? Is your partner treating you well? Are things going well at the workplace?

The worse I came upon is “ Why are you losing all this weight? Are you afraid that if you get fat your husband will go astray?” That’s so insulting, I had to laugh.

Sorry to rain on your parade, Gossip gurus but I’m not that insecure. I’m doing this for me. I want to be a healthy person. I want to be an energetic parent. I don’t want to be out of breath while taking care of the kids and doing household chores. I don’t want to get older and at the same time grow sideways. I want to show that it’s a misconception: you get married, have kids and get fatter –it’s the norm.
When I tell people that, they tend to look at me and smirk. Then they’ll say something unintelligent like , “ Macam perli aku je” . Argh. You brought this up upon me and then suddenly it turns to be about you. Apakah?

So to avoid all that drama, I’ll just smile and shut up. I’ve given up explaining my goals. I’ve given up telling them why I run and exercise and tackle the stairs even though the elevator door is conveniently open. I’ll only tell my story to those who are interested to hear. And I’m not saying I’m all high and mighty and better than them for opting to be this way. They can be what shape they want and be happy about it. I say ;That’s you. That’s your choice. But don’t go around and say hurtful things even if ‘stick and stones can break my bones but words can never harm me’. They don’t harm, but they sure do hurt.

I guess I should focus on what’s important; I’m able to carry my 3 year old heck, even 6 year old, up the stairs without wheezing. I can wear what I want without worrying about any body parts bulging over, I have my husband by my side with mutual goals. I'm happy with me.

Funny thing is, I thought it was a woman thing but hub who lost 10kgs due to running, got this not so long ago,
“ Hei, apsal dah kurus. Bini ko tak bagi makan ek?”



  1. hehe, typical 'caring' msian =) they envy you in good shape =)

  2. LOL, good one julin and its soo kiasu melayu, bila kurus aje mesti ingat yang negative ! my hubs lost weight and one of my friends told me to be careful "lelaki kalau tetiba jer kurus tu mesti ada hal, ada berkenan orang lain kot?" and my husband baru jer buat bypass operation LOL .. ni jeles yang lebih ;p

  3. pakai baju body fit ke hari tu?..
    cara2 nak mengelaknya, pakai baju besar2 sikit..
    kurus takpe, jgn boroi mcm i..

  4. You can't please everybody.

  5. Julin,
    Next time when u n ur hub meet Ian, get him to measure your muscle mass and fat mass percentage. u'll be surprised to see how lean you are, internally.

  6. people being what people are, mesti nak komen no matter what (takde keje).

    I feel you - been smiling and shutting up for 2 years now... tak larat nak layan

  7. My answers to them all "yaloh, no money to eat mah" or "what to do, my hubby didn't buy food for me loh". And they'll pause and asked " you sure or not?" So I said "Then? What do you think?"

    Well, Fong is right. Malaysians are a caring lot. Cheers!

  8. People will talk about anything la doc. if its not weight, its running. unlike you guys, i'm not athletic (neither are the people around me) but i love 'motion' (be it running, jumping or dancing) and bcos i'm also an old makcik, i'm always being warned of busted knees, sprained ankles, bad back, prolapse. i swear, if something did happen to me, it would really make their day.. "see i told you"!!!

    Sheesh.. have some faith la, for each their own.

  9. Kak Kash: It is. But it's nicer if they don't microscope every issue.
    Fong: Malaysian eh? Always have something smart to say.
    KakJune: Tu la pasal. Yang tak tahannya tu, diorang ni suka benor mengapi. Apa yang bestnya ntah.
    Ijam: Haha..manede fit. I tried once wearing a bigger size blouse, but then I gave up because I ended up looking like I came out from kedai bundle.
    KakHaza: Tu la kan? Sigh.

  10. Nik: Yes, I wanna try that. I wanna know my body fat percent. Kena tempah Ian ni. Oh Iann....
    Syah: Takde keje is the word. Exactly. Let's just continue smiling eh?
    Cheryl : That's a good one. I'll try that. Haha. BTW, nice new profile pic. So the very sexy looking one.
    Kak Justiffa: I get that one too all the time. They tell me I'll bust my knee with all that running one day so I tell them I'll think about that when the day comes. In the mean time, we'll just run kan?

  11. Whatever thing people throw, most at my age looks 10 years older and wider - the saddest thing. Some even got diabetes, high blood, heart problem. Me being skinny, I just walk pass them and smile.

  12. You know what's my secret weapon to get even? This is normally what I would say

    "well you know what, it's funny that I was just about to ask you the same thing ... you look as if you have gained/lost weight ... kesian you, what happened to you actually?"

    let's deviate the attention .... :) it works every time!!

  13. Diket: While everybody your age is looking 10 years older, you on the other hand my friend look 10 years younger. Rahsia please?
    Ian: Aiyak, with women folk if you say that, they'll make you their worst enemy..(even if it's true)..tak berani I..haha
    Gerb : Agaknya begitulah kot ( mintak2 begitula kot)

  14. Hi Kak,
    Ala biasalah tu they ols dengki. I got that too here at my workplace but the only way that can shut them up is by asking them to run together. Sure lepas tu they all "err, takpelah...Im glad u kurus sbb lari k. I cannot do that"
    Haaaaa amek sebijik!

  15. Nana: Haha..memang.Jawapan standard kepada " Jom lari!" adelah, "err..takpelah".

  16. Joe: Nikjo jom buat PBIM skali lagi..anak hang pun dah besar taim tu( betul ke nikjo nih?)

  17. Sheesh indeed. Ignore them lah and continue with your amazing life. We totally support you (and hubs) :)

  18. Yin: Thanks and hey, thanks for dropping by ;)